He is a bad habit, but I'm not talking about Maxwell. I'm talking about a real bad habit in my life that Maxwell was singing about. When he calls I get excited but I don't understand why he's thinking about me. He's unavailable. unattainable. I can't have him because he already belongs to someone else. I don't want hers, I want my own. Meanwhile, hes calling me for only God knows what. Who am I kidding? I know what. I'm just as much as his bad habit as he is mine. Truthfully we have tried to set boundaries, they didn't work.
This is the highest costTake you and make you offLove you and leave you lostWill you forgive me?
If I just had a few more weeks maybe everything would have been different. Had I not moved when I did, he could have had a friend in me. Someone he could hang with and have pleasant conversation. He wouldn't be in such a foul mood about his environment. A mutual friend tried to tell me about him. When we finally did connect I was amazed that we were in the same proximity and neither one of us knew the other existed. The irony of it all. When the connection finally came, it was on the evening when I moved away via an instant message. We talked and laughed and began feeling each other out. We finally met face to face and the chemistry was clear. It was going to go down. It's okay because by the following week I was going to be back in my own misery far, far away.
But he should not have kissed me. He should not have kissed me in a way that made the orgasm be mistaken for love. Kissing is too intimate. His kiss created a false sense of security and even though I knew better, even though I consider myself a fairly intelligent woman that moment inside the flesh was carried with me to North Carolina and remains to this day.
Lady when we lock it low (ah, ah)We get together its an overdoseI'm slippin, I'm here, I'm on my kneesI feel my heart's about to explode
Now the whole situation has changed. Pseudo boundaries create an awkward interaction. Insatiable curiosity creates passion because of the distance between us. Guilt is left behind when the door is closed. Conversations are filled with angry words that penetrates deep within my soul. I'm sensitive and gentle yet he deliberately poisons my thoughts to hate him and simultaneously gives me the antidote to want him even more. A vicious cycle of pushing and pulling. I come back like a battered woman thinking that this time won't be as bad as the last time.
You got me, you got meSlippin around with itAround with it, oh why?You got me sick with this love, babyI'm so, I'm so in love I can't come down
Nothing good could ever come of this situation.
Will you forgive me?
1 comment:
But he should not have kissed me. He should not have kissed me in a way that made the orgasm be mistaken for love.
Novel worthy!!
I think you have a book hiding inside of you.
Post a Comment